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Today’s a day off from practice and tomorrow’s a Moon Day. Plus it’s a long weekend — which I just found out about on Wednesday — surprise! My co-workers were appalled that I didn’t know. Yes, I’ve been working too hard.

Okay, so a long weekend with two rest days. What to do? I need something to kick my ass and make me relax. The answer: hot yoga!

I went to a Bikram class… geez, maybe two years ago? Three? It was fine. I never went back. Today, I tried a hot yoga place here in town. It was, uh, hot. Truly, I’m not really sold on the whole hot thing. I mean, I love hot. If they could just tone it down about 10 degrees, I’d be in heaven.

So this place doesn’t do the Bikram sequence, but they do just about as much of the Bikram sequence as you can do without getting sued by Bikram, I guess. Here’s the really good part, though: guess how they start the class? (Squee!!) The do surya namaskaras in the heat! And they do vinyasas in between a good number of the poses. You know what an updog feels like in 115 degree heat? It feels GREAT.

I was sad: no dhanurasana, no ardha matsyendrasana. But get this: they do urdhva dhanurasana! Woohoo! At the end of an hour and a half of super-heated practice, urdhva dhanurasana feels SWEET. Bhujangasana and salabhasana in the heat? Yes! Yes!

The weird recurring savasanas? Love ‘em. For one thing, lying down means if I faint I won’t get hurt. And it’s also a hilarious experience when you apply some insight meditation technique to the whole thing. Spinning lights, shooting energy like my whole skull is carbonated, the explosive heart feelings. Lots of things to note, that’s for sure.

All the balancing stuff? Yeah. Okay. I guess there’s some good in learning how to balance when you are ready to faint. If I practice diligently, I will be able to go into a dead faint and not fall down. Seriously, though, they did a utthita hasta padangusthasana to the side and held it for a minute. “Lock your leg! Lock your leg!” the teacher said. So I tried. And then I got confused, because it’s easier on a locked leg. But I’m pretty sure we’re not supposed to lock our legs in UHP? Sigh. I’ll go check with Gregor Maehle.

As I was heading out, the teacher said, “Obviously you practice yoga…” “Yes,” I said, “Ashtanga.” She got that scared look. Okay, I have to admit it. The scared-of-Ashtanga look always amuses me.