Machiavellian Tips and Tricks
Posted in work on 03/23/2009 02:01 pm by karenYes, I am a zen practitioner, and yes, I bring zen principles to the office.
Sure, but I am also a sharp-humored gal with a scientific streak, so I like my psychological and sociological experiments. The Market Research guy calls me the Cultural Anthropologist.
When someone has a difficult conversation to hold with an employee, or when someone has a daunting presentation, or has been given a dysfunctional team to manage, well, I like to sit with that person and frame the whole ordeal as an experiment.
This is useful for a couple of reasons:
1. It introduces some objectivity into the equation. It’s hard to freak out when you are busy observing the situation.
2. Experiments are fun! No matter how awful an experience might be, if you have data to interpret at the end, it can’t be all bad.
Okay, so there you have it. There are things I notice and experiment with that don’t exactly fall within traditional zen parameters. And so we introduce Machiavellian Tips and Tricks.
Tip 1: Dress for success
Can you bend people to your will, depending on how you’re dressed? Oh yeah.
What you need for this experiment:
Put on suit and shoes. Go to work. Pay attention to whether everyone thinks it’s a good idea to listen to what you say and do the things you suggest. It’s magical! (Men, you are on your own — I have no idea what the guy-equivalent of this experiment is.)
Could I be disingenuous and say the pencil skirt suit and high heels combo has no power? I could. But I’d be lying. Clearly, they do. Magical corporate power. My red purse actually seems to have some, too. Red accessories in general. This is a function of my particular office, I think. Other colors probably work in other environments. We are traditional and buttoned-down. In a more avant garde office you’re gonna have to experiment to find out what works.
Can you bend people to your will, if you dress a certain way? Oh yeah. Should you practice your zen and be mindful about how you use these powers? Yes. Yes, you should.
03/23/2009 at 5:15 pm
Do you think that the outfit changes how you act or the responses of others? I always feel more confident wearing boots with a bit of a heel, click-clicking down the hall. I presume I project that confidence, whether or not anyone else notices the boots. In other words, does one use these trappings to manipulate oneself or others? Sadly, I now live in the land of flip-flops (or slippers, as they are called here) and you just feel silly wearing boots when it’s sunny and 80 all the time.
03/24/2009 at 3:08 am
i LOVE the heels-and-pencil skirt combo. Since I don’t boss anyone around in my work, my findings are different: Whenever I dress that way I get better service! At France Telecom, at the Préfecture, anywhere. It’s not just a nice outfit… it’s Sexy Librarian. I twist my hair up into a knot and carry my Matt and Nat bag *pour completer l’ensemble*.
It’s hot and sunny here too, but thankfully these people are French and feel, in general, that we all have a civic responsibility to iron our clothes and “faire beau” for the people who have to look at us all day long.
03/24/2009 at 5:05 am
Wombat, are you in Hawaii? I have a friend from Hawaii who calls flip-flops “slippers.”
I think the “power” is a combo of how I feel as well as how others see me. But a good portion of it really is how others perceive the clothing. When I wore the red peep toe Oxfords, I told one of my work friends about how my daughter had called them “heinous.”
“I don’t really ‘get’ them, either,” she admitted. I told her they seem to be a love or hate thing, with most people coming down on the side of love. She was dubious.
Then a person walking past in the hall said, “Wow, I love your shoes.” My friend raised her eyebrow.
A little later we were going into a meeting room. A passerby said, “Those are great shoes.” My friend grinned at me.
Leaving the meeting, the CEO said, “Great shoes.” My friend turned to me and said, “Okay, I’m convinced.”
03/24/2009 at 9:53 am
Karen- your comment story is hilarious! The shoes are GREAT, even if they are slightly hideous! ha ha!!
I really loved this entry. I think I’m going to cut and paste your list into a Word document to print out and post by my computer. Good rules to live by. I’m especially struck by the “perceived” insults, aggravations, grudges, bad feelings, etc. So true!! So much of life’s problems are just in our heads.
Thanks for this-
03/24/2009 at 4:21 pm
Yes, I’m the “Live Traffic Feed” from Honolulu. When I interviewed for my job here, I wore strappy sandals with a heel. Those were pretty good confidence shoes. Sadly, with the humidity, they gave me blisters, so now I stick to Tevas or slippers. Without the shoes, I have to rely on tank tops with Ashtanga arms for confidence.
03/24/2009 at 4:49 pm
Oooh, tank tops and Ashtanga arms are VERY powerful!
03/25/2009 at 10:21 am
Yeah, the peep toed oxfords are heinous, but in a good way. I prefer non-peep toed oxfords.
I’ve found that it’s relatively easy to cool people down by modulating my voice. I slow my tempo just a bit, use a slightly deeper timber and enunciate fluidly and people tend to chillax and listen more carefully. Of course, that doesn’t necessarily mean I’m more successful at coaxing them to grasp better ideas. When people are hooked on the same old ideas it’s pretty hard to dislodge them. But at least they are less frenetic when I confront them about their boring, old barely sustainable ideas.
Oh, and did you know that most shoes that are touted as ‘oxfords’ in the U.S. actually are of the derby design? You can check out the differences at wikipedia, just in case you’re curious.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derby_shoe
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxford_shoe