The Cop and I are watching the Super Bowl. A commercial about the stages of a man’s life. Amusing. At the end they announce Dove Soap for Men.
“Karen!” The Cop bellows, “Have I been using WOMEN’S SOAP?!?!”
Dude
Posted in ashtanga yoga, dog!, things i do to myself on 02/04/2010 10:05 am by karenChatting online with Liz and Sonya the other day and somehow the topic turned to my love (adoration, more accurately) of stoner stuff. Dude, where’s my car? Sweet! Obviously I cannot act upon my love of all things stoner (Officer Husband’s career would certainly suffer if he had a stoner wife), but I did indulge myself a bit this morning by practicing to a Grateful Dead soundtrack. Wheeee! Seriously, if you want happy happy energy, practice to the Dead. Next social event with The Cop & his colleagues, I’ll be the chick wearing tie dye!
In a weird twist of (perhaps practice-induced) mental flexibility, I’ve “allowed myself” (yeah, yeah, red flag, I know) to gain almost 5 pounds. This was an intuitive move — clear of intent but nebulous of purpose — and I’m really enjoying it (aside from very infrequent flashes of “I’ve let myself go!” panic). So yes, I am enjoying it physically — feeling strong and robust and energetic, and really REALLY resilient — though occasionally feeling uncomfortable in my mind. What’s breaking the tie between body and mind is the fact that the extra weight seems to be oiling the backbends quite dramatically.
My back is supple in a way that I’ve never experienced before. Perhaps my deeply held, brittle self-discipline re: body size affects physical flexibility? Does this rise to the level of a DUH! observation? Or is it woo woo mysticism? I don’t know! I can’t distinguish between the utterly obvious and crazy delusion because I’m just a hippie!
And here’s The Dude with his new stuffed elephant toy.
More chips o’ wisdom
Posted in things i like, zen on 01/19/2010 03:11 pm by karenWhy is it difficult to practice? We face a lot of pressure in this world to go fast, and we’ve become very complicated. We have to make our minds simple, present, attentive. If we don’t make our minds simple, it’s very difficult to pay attention to what we’re doing.
I read about an experiment that was done on dogs. I hesitate to talk about it because we want to protect animals from research, but it leads to an interesting point you may have discovered in your own practice. They kept young dogs in cages until they were very, very hungry, then put some food on one end of a special cage. Between the dogs and the food was a metal grid. When the dogs tried to reach the food they received a fairly strong electrical shock. After a couple of times the dogs would not cross the grid even when there was no electricity. Even if the dogs were starving they wouldn’t try it, and they would jump off if the researchers put them on the grid.
Then the researchers went a step further and found the only way to get rid of that conditioning was to hold the dogs on the grid when there was no shock. The dogs didn’t learn very quickly. Each dog went through everything it went through when it was shocked – trembling, screeching, urinating, completely losing control. But after it had gone through this whole reaction the dog would realize there was no more shock, and then it could cross the grid.
This has relevance to us because our karmic conditioning is the same. We’ve conditioned ourselves to react to certain situations. To get free of that conditioning we have to put ourselves into the situation and stay there while we go through all the trembling and sweating and urination in our pants, until we realize there is no shock in the grid. Nothing is really going on there. In my experience the tendrils of karma are very deep. Dharma Master Ji Kwang Dae Poep Sa Nim says, “Your karma seems really heavy. But when you finally take it off, it’s just like a thin piece of paper.” You have to be willing to practice with your whole body and mind to digest it, to de-condition it, and to see very clearly what is there and what isn’t there. Then even a shock won’t affect you.
[My Gift grew up answering the question "What would Dae Bong do?" Hilarious when applied to schoolyard dramas and high school hijinks. Still, it's never steered us wrong.]
Words of wisdom, chips of turnip
Posted in ashtanga yoga, raw food, things i like on 01/19/2010 11:55 am by karenWords of wisdom. Not mine, of course 
Here is the basic prescription for any question: Open the hips, then the back. Heal the knees (by opening the hips, then the back). If you want to do the next pose, perfect all the previous ones. If you want to start Second Series, deepen the backbends. If you want to do Third Series, don’t. You probably shouldn’t. If you are frequently injured or miss practices, scale back or do primary only until the inconsistency is all gone for a long time. Never, ever skip practice. And implicitly: don’t feel sorry for yourself, work hard, give thanks to your teachers, breathe deep, defer to SKPJ in all things, and make offerings to Ganesh.
Or, as Soen Sa Nim said (before Nike ever thought of it): Just do it!
***
Fun with the dehydrator! Right now on my desk, there’s a little zip-lock bag of dried salted kale leaves and crispy turnip chips, and a bag of dried apple rings and pineapple wedges. All very yummy. But I’ll tell you what: I consider the dehydrator worth its price and the amount of space it takes up (kind of a lot), just for the unbelievable deliciousness of raw flax crackers.
I’ve always had little tea splatters under my desk from tossing my tea bags into the waste basket. Now there’re a few flax seeds under there, too. I’m pretty convinced a human could live happily on flax crackers and tea. The Cop will definitely disagree on this. He is amused by the dehydrator, particularly when I tell him I can use it to squirrel away food for the coming apocalypse (he’s always ready for that eventuality).
Yup, we’ll be set for the apocalypse. Guns and ammo? Check! Large, protective dog? Check! Dried food? Check! Ice dancing routine? Check!
Happy Friday
Posted in dog! on 01/15/2010 09:40 am by karenSo I look over last night and all I can think is, “God, I have to make him some pants.”
Ice dancing
Posted in moment on 01/03/2010 04:25 pm by karenCop, approaching me: “I’m going to put my hands under your armpits and lift you up…”
Me: “Huh? Why?”
Cop, with his hands under my arms: “One! Two! Three!”
Me, getting heavy so he can’t lift me up: “What are you doing?!”
Cop: “You jump and I’ll catch you up over my head. It’ll be fun. One… two…”
Me: “No! I don’t want to!”
Cop, disappointed: “Why not? It’s like ice dancing. What’s the worst thing that can happen?”
Me, nodding toward a 7 foot tall bookshelf made of 95% glass and 5% metal: “I don’t want to fall on that. We’re not trained to do this!”
Cop, setting up to throw: “If anything goes wrong, I’ll throw you toward the bed. One… two.. three!”
Me, up in the air over his head, having made the jump: {screaming sound}
Cop, putting me down: “See? Like ice dancing.”
Recipe!
Posted in things i like, veggie food on 01/02/2010 03:41 pm by karenAs noted in the past, when The Cop is at work, I cook things that I love but which horrify him.
Today I’m making Crispy Kale! It’s as yummy as potato chips (I have a potato chip problem…).
Crispy Kale
A bunch of kale, torn into bite-sized pieces and tough stems removed
1-2 tablespoons olive oil
sea salt or kosher salt
1. Preheat oven to 350F.
2. Rinse and salad spin the kale. Use a towel to blot any extra water on the leaves. Place the kale on the baking sheet.
3. Drizzle olive oil over the kale leaves and use your hands to toss and coat the leaves. Bake in the oven for 12-20 minutes until leaves are crisp. Check the kale at the 12 minute mark. If the leaves are paper-thin crackly, it’s done. If the leaves are still a bit soft, leave them in for another 2 minutes. Do not let the leaves turn brown. Remove from oven, sprinkle with salt and serve.
Dana: I suspect that, much like the last post, you may be disappointed with this.
Yoga Vacay!
Posted in ashtanga yoga on 01/01/2010 02:34 pm by karenI’d been thinking a bit about where to do a yoga vacation in 2010, and suddenly it dawned on me. There’s an authorized teacher right here in Arizona! Duh! I can’t believe I didn’t think of this sooner.
I sent Lisa an email, asking if it’d be okay for me to visit for a couple of weeks in April & she replied that that would be fine. I figure I’ll go to Mysore practice, and then perhaps book a private class or two while I’m there.
The best part of this is that The Cop wants to come along. Usually I’m on my own for yoga vacations, so this is terrific news! There’s great mountain biking in Tucson for him, so we’ll pack up Waylon, the Manduka, and his mountain bike and spend two weeks in a vacation rental.
Now I just need to find a place to rent. I’ve been looking at a few websites and they have increeeeedibly slooooooow servers. Gah! I hate going slow on the information superhighway! Still, this is a pretty good problem to have.
Random and hilarious
Posted in things i like on 12/26/2009 11:42 am by karenTrolling YouTube for some good passive stretches for the psoas, and I came across this vid that:
1) Actually simulates a stretch the chiro did with me.
2) Includes the quote: “I’m only gonna show you on one side, because you’re not idiots.”
3) Offers some hilarious advice on where to get relationship advice.
All I want for Christmas is a chiropractic session
Posted in ashtanga yoga on 12/25/2009 11:55 am by karenA lovely Christmas with the family. My Dad had the pleasure of sharing bourbon with not only his daughter, but also his granddaughter. It’s kind of sweet. My Dad enjoys having a drink every day, and he particularly likes that I drink bourbon with him when I visit. And last night, My Gift joined us for the first time.
Bonding over booze. Nothing like a family holiday.
Seriously, though, it was all very nice — the humans ate, laughed and exchanged gifts, and the dogs got along well.
***
I went to a new chiropractor this week. I wanted some help sorting out what I figured was a sore QL. It only bothers me in kapotasana, urdhva dhanurasana and dropbacks, but those are the postures I am most interested in these days, so I wanted to see if there was any need for an adjustment. I can feel that the pain is related to some kind of subtle twist in my hips (and, by default, spine), and I don’t want to let it go unaddressed, since twisting torque is not the body’s friend.
My initial consultation was pretty funny. I had to fill out a sheet that asked how bad my pain was on a scale of 1 to 10 (I said 2). I had to indicate if the pain affected any of a long list of activities (answered no to all of them, since “affects asana practice” wasn’t an option). And I had to indicate whether the pain was constant or intermittent, and qualify the character of the pain (”searing,” “stabbing,” etc. — there was no option for “makes me want to skip to closing poses”).
So then the chiro did some kinesthetic tests.
“Touch your toes,” he said.
I put my hands on the floor.
“Any pain?” he asked.
“No.”
“Bend as far back as you can,” he said.
I did a hangback.
“Does that hurt?” he asked.
“No.”
I lay on the table and he pushed my leg toward my face. Started laughing as it just kept going.
“Most of my patients would be screaming before I got their legs perpendicular to the table. Does this hurt at all?”
“No.”
He tried external hip rotations (a half lotus and then pushing down on my knee).
“Anything?”
“No.”
He did an assisted backbend stretch that was similar to dhanurasana.
“No pain,” I said.
He looked at the info I’d given him and said, “I’m having a hard time understanding what we need to do here.”
I explained that if I am on my knees and then back bend and try to grab my feet, THAT’S when I feel the pain. He laughed again.
Anyhow, the upshot of all of this is that he thinks it’s not my QL, but my left hip flexor. Okay, I’m willing to work with that hypothesis. I like that he is trying to solve for this despite the fact that it falls outside of his diagnostic tests. He talked about kidneys and meridians and tailbones — I kind of glazed over a bit because I’m not up on the meridian stuff (I’m doing some reading now to try to catch up), and then there was an adjustment and some ultrasound. Nice.
The next day, I felt pretty stiff and sore. Today, though, I woke up with intense sensation in my psoas muscles (both sides). Not simple pain, though it was a little painful, but more the kind of sensation where you are super-attuned to the muscle. Like it’s slightly chilled taffy with tons of nerve endings. Did primary this morning, paying lots of attention to the easy-to-access sensation of the psoas. I hope this sensitivity stays for a little while — I know I have work to do here.
Anyhow, another session on Monday. We’ll see how it goes.
***
Merry Christmas to all of you. I hope you get everything you wish for in 2010.